Aisle be Back: Sexton, the All Blacks and the NPC semi-finals

• By Kevin McCarthy

I guess we’ve all met Johnny Sexton at some point. As Noel Gallagher described brother Liam: He’s like a man with a fork in a world of soup.

If you haven’t heard, Rieko Ioane last year delivered a pithy farewell to the Irish and world great as his side were trumped in an epic quarter final at the World Cup. Somewhat ungracious words, not from the top drawer of sledges (e.g. Four More Years Boys ….).

Still top points for effectiveness, and he was of course plying his last game for Ireland. As it was all on film, you can see the moment Sexton’s brain explodes, like in the Zapruder tapes.

We’re talking about it still because Sexton is, in his autobiography, using it as a vehicle to rail against no-dickhead All Blacks, New Zealand fans, and New Zealand in general. Bizarrely, he moans about playing rugby here on tour, and discovering it was winter. Who knew.

Protestations by Sexton since that he is shocked at the reaction, I suppose could be taken at face value. Or he was just following the advice of his book publicist,

As an aside I once ended up in England sharing a pint with a retired English scrumhalf who toured here sometime in the late 70s or early eighties. All he remembered was bad weather, and the crowds chanting Bleck Bleck Bleck (much better than the current chant). Possibly not the finest winning mindset.

As for the sledging, I am sure Sexton was not experiencing his first. Nor was he a stranger to delivering them himself.

Perhaps he was feeling what we all feel when floored by something – and five minutes later, thinking of the perfect riposte.

Unfortunately, if his book was that perfect reply, it rather feels sour. And Ioane’s supposed final word on the topic – an Instagram post – was pitch perfect and far better than the original sledge. A pic of the two players, and the Zombies anthem on loop. In Your Head ….

Not that living rent-free in Johnny Sexton’s head is necessarily a good deal.

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No bets on the NPC semi-finals tomorrow – Lions hosting Waikato and earlier, By of Plenty at home to Canterbury.

Any of the four could trip up late, so probably safest to say home advantage WINS.

Canterbury’s thumping of Tasman last week just goes to show that holding the Shield is both a boon and a curse. I think without that hangover, they’d probably still be in the semi-final mix.

More here:

Lions hosting semi-final on Saturday and charity game on Sunday

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Not to wish any ill  on any players, but injury has opened the way for Peter Lakai to the big show.

I’m sure everyone is hoping – with a high degree of confidence – that this is going to be the start of something special.

In the pink and now in the black – Peter Lakai. Photo: Hugh Pretorius.

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The upcoming fixtures for the All Blacks are as follows:  

• Saturday 26 October- All Blacks vs Japan, 6.50PM (NZST), Nissan Stadium, Yokohama

• Sunday 03 November – All Blacks vs England, 4.10AM (NZST), Twickenham Stadium, London

• Saturday 09 November – All Blacks vs Ireland, 9.10AM (NZST), Aviva Stadium, Dublin

• Sunday 17 November – All Blacks vs France, 9.10AM (NZST), Stade de France, Paris

• Sunday 24 November – All Blacks vs Italy, 9.10AM (NZST), Allianz Stadium, Turin